When we begin to focus on our goals it’s often not just what we are looking for in a romantic partner that we start to clarify. We also begin to get clear on what we want in ALL aspects of our lives. This is a great process as without knowing what it is we want – we can’t ever get it. However, as we begin to move through the Quantum Creating process we may begin to notice that what we think we want is at odds with what we really need deep down inside. Nowhere can this become more apparent than with our romantic goals.
Despite what we may think it’s often not as simple as just deciding what qualities we are looking for in a romantic partner and then putting that desire out there. Often the reason people fail in this goal – and others – is that the actual, tangible possibility of having it brings up hidden issues and feelings we may have been unaware of. When we don’t have a partner we often fantasise about how great it would be if we did have someone. But in the cocoon of our dreams we neglect to include our reactions to them. So, when we do meet them these hidden feelings surface and can lead us to sabotage the very thing we’ve worked so hard to manifest and desired for so long. For example, you may be visualising yourself in a relationship with someone who is intelligent, successful and good-looking. The person turns up and appears to be smitten with you but suddenly you find yourself battling feelings of insecurity and jealousy. What is someone this amazing doing with someone like you? They say they love you but do they mean it? Soon you find yourself trapped in a cycle of paranoia and negativity instead of allowing love to flow.
For any goal you’re working with and especially one that involves a relationship take the time to step back and imagine your feelings once you’ve attracted the person or situation you want. How do you feel? Imagine yourself in day-to-day situations not the initial rush of euphoria we all feel when falling in love or getting what we want. Imagine your ideal partner talking to someone who is also very attractive at a party. They are laughing and it all looks a bit flirtatious. How do you feel? Are you secure in the fact it is you your partner wants to be with or are feelings of mistrust creeping in? If so, you have identified a potential issue and it’s important now to look at where these feelings originated from and deal with them before the person or a similar situation really does manifest.
In order to really live out our dreams, we need to let go of the past. Very often feelings of unworthiness, insecurity and lack-of-trust have their roots in previous relationships or even childhood experiences. Part of being a Warrior for Love in your own life is being fearless enough to look back at these situation and deal with the emotional fallout from your new perspective of empowerment and strength. By looking at what could be the reality of your emotional reaction before the event takes place you are now in a position to create the outcome you always wanted – free of the hidden obstacles that hold you back.