Sometimes when we have set ourselves life-changing goals, it’s easy to become discouraged when they are taking longer to manifest than we thought or when we hit that ‘brick wall’ – when nothing we do seems to help or have any effect. At this point, it’s all too easy to give up and decide that whatever it is we want – that fabulous, loving relationship or that satisfying, well-paid career, just isn’t for us. Perhaps we justify this in some way – usually by replaying an old tape that reinforces negative perceptions we have about ourselves. These can be anything from ‘I’ll never have enough money’ to ‘Well, I’m not the kind of person anyone would want to fall in love with’. Now these usually have their roots in our childhood or in past disappointments – but as many of us know, they can be awfully persistent and no matter how hard we try, if things start to go wrong, they can make themselves heard again pretty loudly no matter how much work we’ve done on ourselves, or how our ‘logical’ mind tells us they aren’t true.
So, if you find yourself in the situation (or back in this situation), what can you do? I’ve found there are two very simple steps you can take to break yourself free and set you back on the path towards your goals. What’s more – you’ll start to enjoy life and have fun again while doing so – and isn’t that what going after our goals is supposed to be all about? Fun?
The first step is to start to enjoy the ‘now’. If you’ve not read my article on Supercharging your Soul Path then take a look at that as it allows us to see the potential that’s available to us. In addition to that, we need to let go of focussing on goal attainment – the kind of thinking that says ‘I will sacrifice and go without until I get so-and-so’ or else ‘When I am in my ideal relationship I will be happy’ – and instead enjoy where we are right this minute! If you have set yourself a long term goal – anything from saving a deposit for your first home, a course of study or working towards starting your own business, then please don’t forget to celebrate ‘milestones’ along the way and to budget if necessary for doing so. For example, let’s say you want to buy your own home and have decided that you won’t take a holiday or splash out on anything major until you have that deposit. While this is commendable you may in the end find life gets very dull indeed on the way. Far better to allow yourself a budget to reward yourself when you get to certain milestones – say every £5,000 you allow yourself a certain amount to spend on a break or something you want to give yourself that ‘pat on the back’. You are much more likely to stay the course if you do! Similarly, don’t wait for a relationship to happen to be happy. Create a life that’s filled with love and joy right now by enjoying the loving relationships you do have with friends and family and by doing the things you love to do – even if you do do them on your own at present. Happy, joyful people attract love. Don’t wait for someone to ‘complete’ you.
The second step is an NLP technique that anyone can do. The thing is, no matter what it is you are trying to manifest in your life right now, at some point in your past you had the experience of having it on some level. Now, it’s doesn’t matter whether you lost it or not, what you need to reconnect to is the feeling you had when you had it! Perhaps if a relationship is your goal it was when you were in one and things were going well for you. Or it could be a time when you had a bit more money than usual and not only was paying your bills no problem, you had money over to enjoy yourself as well without worrying. Perhaps it was hearing you had just been accepted on a course you wanted to take or a job offer. Take a moment to go back and recall exactly how you felt inside at that time. Where you were, how your body felt, what you thought, and also what you smelled and tasted. Immerse yourself for a moment in these good feelings and memories as this is what success feels like for you. If you like, write down all these feelings thoughts and impressions so you can recall them easily. As you go back through the list or re-run the feelings in your mind, make a fist. Repeat this process 10 times in your mind, making that fist. As you practice doing this you will eventually find that just by making the first you can recall the situation at will – and relive the feelings of happiness and achievement.
By doing this you will set yourself back on the path to your goals as you know that you have experienced success in the past – and will re-experience it at a higher level in the future.
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