Unconditional Love – Never Say No

Unconditional love means never saying no and other myths

A number of spiritual ideas can leave a lot  of people confused  when it comes to how they work in practice, so I thought I’d clarify a few myths that seem to circulate!

Unconditional love means never saying no.

The notion of unconditional love can get mixed up with the idea that if we love someone unconditionally, whatever they do to us is okay.  This is absolutely not true. Especially as unconditional love starts with you!  You can love someone without condition but it doesn’t mean you have to turn yourself into a doormat. In such instances, you can unconditionally love someone from a safe and big distance away!  Never let yourself be persuaded to accept behavior that isn’t good for you in the name of unconditional love. Don’t force yourself into that corner because you think it’s the right and spiritual thing to do.

Using the Law of Attraction or Cosmic Ordering means you don’t have to do anything else.

Work on your vibration. Get clear on what you want to attract. Put out your Cosmic Orders and believe that you deserve good things. But also, carry on making your own way in the direction you want to go in! That means working on your skills, making contacts, getting yourself out there and taking any practical steps you can to make your dreams come true. Your dream job or the love of your life is probably not going to come and find you if you are at home under your duvet.

Judgement versus Discernment.

Many people involved in spirituality say that it’s bad to be judgmental, but that’s a bit of a paradox. If we say it’s bad to be judgemental, aren’t we being judgemental about being judgemental? It’s actually more useful to step away from that whirligig and use our discernment (and it’s perfectly okay to do so) and easier to think in terms of preferences. When we tell someone else they shouldn’t be angry, we certainly sound as though we are being judgemental, for example. But we can decide that we prefer not to be shouted at and have every right to say lovingly, ‘I can see this is important to you but I’m finding really hard to get what you are saying. ’  And we can draw boundaries and say no without being judgemental.

If someone is your soul mate you are destined to be together forever.

The only real answer to this is….sometimes.  We all have many soul mates throughout our lives who come in all shapes and packages.  They can be family members, friends and lovers who may or may not be with us for the whole of our journey here.  A soul mate connection is profound and deep, but not necessarily forever.

Psychic readings tell your future.

They can – but actually the best psychic readers will use their psychic gifts to help you step into your power so that you can create your future.    We all have free will and the ability to shape our destinies.   A good psychic reading can help you identify the energies and patterns you are working with so that you can shape them to being in alignment with what you want to attract.

If something bad happens to me, it must be because I attracted it. 

It’s always worth looking at our beliefs and behaviour to see how we can most powerfully respond to what happens to us in our lives, but the truth is far more complex than this.  What we encounter along our life’s journey is a mix of what we attract with our vibration, the exchange of vibration with those around us, what patterns we might be playing out at an individual, collective or even ancestral level – and is even informed by where we are trying to head in our future!  The most important thing is how we respond to what happens as that is our point of power, and other than that, it’s best to avoid getting into the blame and shame game!

Hopefully that’s set a few records straight – and if there’s anything that has confused or been bugging you, ask away!

Loads of love,

Michele x

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