If you’ve yet to reach your goal or just feel you are being held back in some way from experiencing the wonderful, vibrant, creative and love-filled life you deserve, there may be a psychic block that’s preventing you from reaching it. We all know about looking at the negative thoughts and beliefs we may be harbouring – either consciously or unconsciously, about what we can have/achieve/deserve – but it can be more subtle than that. I’ve often talked about what we have to ‘give up’ in order to have our dreams come true – and the thing is, what we need to give up usually isn’t what we think.
I saw this brilliantly illustrated the other night on a TV show. Very often it’s so much easier to grasp the simple truth behind what stands between us and our desires when it’s woven into a story for us. Of course, this goes back to the ancient storytelling traditions when the village shaman or healer would tell a story to help guide us through challenges. We’re just lucky in this day and age of mass media that we have access to these even if they are distortions of real kick ass Goddess mythology, somewhere in there we can still sniff out the truth!
I don’t know how many of you watch the TV series Once Upon A Time? For the uninitiated, this is a contemporary twist on traditional fairytales with all our favourite characters trapped in a modern-day village called Storybrook. We meet Snow White, the Prince, Rumplestiltskin, Beauty – and of course, the Wicked Queen but there are many surprising twists and turns as well as new interpretations of old characters, so things don’t turn out quite as expected…
Now, I know that fairytales are stolen Goddess myths and Patriarchal guff and indeed that Wicked Queen mythology was invented to keep a strong woman down but none the less there was an interesting message in this episode which does mirror real life!
Without giving away any spoilers, I was watching an episode featuring a flash-back of the Wicked Queen (Regina) – before she became the Wicked Queen. We discover the love of Regina’s life was killed and she was forced into a loveless marriage with Snow White’s father in which she feels alone and excluded. Her unhappiness is leading her down a path to evil as she does not see a way out. She is visited by Tinkerbell who tells her not to give up on love and that her soul mate is still out there for her. Tinkerbell’s soft heart leads her to steal some pixie dust to show Regina where her soul mate is. She casts the spell and shows Regina her soul-mate is in an inn and has a lion tattoo on his arm.
Now, I don’t want to give away too much here for those of you who have not seen it, but it turns out that although Regina went to the inn to find him, she did not go in. Years later, she and Tinkerbell meet again and Tinkerbell realises that for things to have worked out the way they did – and for Regina to have continued down her path – she could not have gone into the inn. She tells Regina she was selfish as her actions not only ruined her own life (and Tinkerbell’s) but the life of her soul mate too. Regina had not considered this, but Tinklebell tells her in a moment of absolute clarity that what stopped Regina from entering the inn was fear of letting go of all her negative feelings – anger, fear, loneliness, resentment. These were so powerful that they made Regina fear to let them go and be happy. From another point of view, there is a deeper message here than just saying this is unfeminist programme making that tries to convince us all that having a man is the answer to all our problems! What I believe this is really all about is saying that we need to look at any negative feelings or beliefs that stand in the way of any dream we have – be it being with the man or woman of our dreams, landing that perfect job or fulfilling a lifelong ambition and driving down Route 66 on a Harley. Everyone has their own idea of what happiness is – just as what lies between us and getting it can be just as personal.
Although our conscious minds know that negative thoughts and feelings prevent us from being all we can be and having the life and love we so desperately desire, these feelings are so strong they will fight for their survival. As human beings we are hard-wired to stick with what we know – even if what we know is negative! Now, I’m not saying you are a Wicked Queen but we can all fall from our path and become people we do not even recognise. So, being happy scared Regina so much her negative feelings triumphed and she sacrificed her happiness and the happiness of others in the process. So, getting to our goals isn’t just about setting our intentions around what we want. It’s about looking within first and really facing up to those negative emotions, damage, protection that may rise up at the last moment and sabotage us. If we work on these first, we are free then to get to our goals!
As for Regina – well, I’m not giving you any more spoilers. You will just have to watch and see if she and the man with the lion tattoo are reunited at the end and she too finally gets her Happily Ever After or does she do herself a favour and buy a Harley for a round the world adventure she’s been meaning to have? As we can all do if we truly face what we have to give up first. Whatever your dream let go of past pain and fly.
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