Feeling blocked? One pesky problem that you can’t shift? It’s amazing how we can unconsciously sabotage ourselves when it comes to reaching our goals and the thing is unless someone else flags it for us, we can carry on doing this – and getting more and more frustrated our dreams aren’t manifesting as we thought they would! I believe we should dream big – the bigger the better in fact. But aside from not taking action at all, it is taking the wrong action that often results in us not manifesting our goals. It’s important when heading to the stars to keep our feet firmly grounded in reality and awareness of what we are doing – and when what we are doing is just plain counter-productive and goes against what our intentions are.
Here are the four main traps we can fall into when it comes to turning a goal into a reality.
Love: You say you want a loving and fully committed relationship but then go and fall for someone who is unavailable either emotionally or in status. Other variations of this include falling for someone who lives on the other side of the world (and neither of you wants to relocate) or someone who has a different sexual orientation. If you want a relationship then don’t start one with someone who is not in a position to reciprocate your feelings or be with you 100%. Getting the love you want and deserve begins with self-love and self-love has nothing to do with putting yourself through a lot of pain and unrequited longing. If this is a pattern for you then you should read as much as you can on emotional unavailability. Sometimes it is not just the other person who is unavailable but actually us on some level. They are just a reflection of this. Start to really love and appreciate yourself. When you do you will not only refuse to put yourself through these experiences any more but you will attract potential partners who are able to truly love and cherish you.
Money: You want more abundance in your life but refuse to open your bank statements, keep track of your spending, charge the going rate for your skills or worst of all, go around saying you don’t care about money. If this is your attitude then money will not care about you either. Increasing our net worth not only begins with increased self-worth but also with cultivating a relationship with money the way you would a person. How are you treating money? With contempt or with care? Choose the latter and watch how your relationships and your bank account starts to transform.
Happiness: Really is a choice and a state of mind. We all have to navigate times in our lives where we feel sad, depressed or at a loss such as when a relationship breaks down, we lose our jobs or someone close to us dies. Sadness and grief are the natural responses to these kinds of events. But aside from that we can choose to be grateful for the things that are going well in our lives as opposed to the things that aren’t. We can choose to focus on what we do have right now as opposed to what we don’t. By shifting our focus we get happy. It’s that simple.
Wellbeing: You may say you want to be fitter and healthier but are you living as a fit person would? You don’t have to be following the latest celebrity diet or be a gym junkie. But too many processed foods, taking no exercise, smoking, drinking and not listening to your body will only result in trouble in the long term and in the short one you won’t achieve your wellness goal either. Wellbeing and weight loss if that is also your goal, only comes from making permanent lifestyle changes. Surprisingly enough they often only need be small ones to make a big difference to your life. You don’t need to sacrifice all the things that give you pleasure – or be out jogging at 6am every morning before work to be fit and healthy. Choosing to eat organic just a couple of days a week, cutting down the number of glasses of wine you drink, not having that muffin every day with your coffee or getting off the bus one stop early and walking that bit further to work or home can result in you being fitter and kilos lost with no effort over a 12 month period. Looking after your wellness is one of the most empowering acts of self-love we can undertake – and the one that gives us the energy to reach those all other goals!
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